‘Friends’ Gave Fans Some Terrible Relationship Advice, Expert Says

by Jeremy Spirogis
Ross and Rachel on Friends

The iconic NBC sitcom Friends gave us one of the crucial memorable TV quotes of all time. Ross yelling, “We were on a break!” remains to be repeated — and debated — to today. It’s only one instance of many displaying the six castmates engaged in extremely questionable relationships.

The present had loads of heartwarming moments plus cases of pure friendship. However, when it got here to depicting romantic relationships, at the least one skilled claims Friends may promote unhealthy behaviors. Here’s how a pair’s therapist felt in regards to the love tales on the sequence.

Ross and Rachel being on break was inappropriate

Ross and Rachel on Friends
Ross and Rachel on ‘Friends’ | NBCU Photo Bank/NBCUniversal through Getty Images

There are prolonged dissertations devoted to who was proper within the Ross/Rachel argument about being on a break. The incident occured throughout “The One Where Ross and Rachel Take a Break” and entails Ross having a one evening stand after mistakenly considering Rachel connected with a coworker. He claimed it wasn’t dishonest as a result of they have been technically damaged up. Rachel argued he ought to have stayed devoted throughout their non permanent separation.

Fans disagree on who was “right” within the state of affairs. However, couple’s therapist and licensed scientific psychologist Bukky Kolawole mentioned neither get together was justified in performing so selfishly. She mentioned their stubbornness induced severe harm.

“If [Ross and Rachel] had been willing to give up whose definition was right and engaged in the more vulnerable and therefore more courageous way … they could have worked together to save and restore their relationship, potentially even [making] it stronger,” Kolawole informed Insider.

They had horrible communication

RELATED: ‘Friends’: How Jennifer Aniston Really Felt About Rachel and Joey’s Relationship

Besides simply the “we were on a break” argument, the couple’s therapist claimed Ross and Rachel hardly ever took their conversations deeper than floor degree. This led to a lack of awareness between them and is a large a part of why they broke up so regularly.

“Because Ross and Rachel were stuck focusing on the content of the communication and unfortunately did not know how to tune into the deeper, underlying, emotional message being communicated, they missed the opportunity to help each other in a catastrophic moment for the relationship where they were each struggling emotionally,” Kolawole continued.

Monica and Ross didn’t deal with age variations effectively

Ross and Rachel weren’t the one dysfunctional ones.

Monica Geller had some points throughout her relationship with Richard as a result of he was a lot older than she was. While there’s nothing fallacious with an age hole, Kolawole mentioned deep conversations about expectations would have made their relationship stronger. Especially to start with.

On the other finish of the spectrum, Ross dated his scholar, Elizabeth, who was a lot youthful. Their relationship suffered from completely different challenges — particularly when her intimidating father Paul Stevens (Bruce Willis) acquired concerned.

Both may have been strengthened by way of honesty, compromise, and intentional conversations.

Some relationships on ‘Friends’ labored higher than others

Even the most effective relationships on Friends wasn’t excellent on a regular basis. Monica and Chandler took their friendship to a brand new degree and saved their romance secret for some time, ready to see how severe it grew to become. Kolawole mentioned a few of the greatest romantic partnerships start as friendships. But these additionally require laborious work.

She even mentioned Rachel and Joey may have gotten previous their preliminary hurdles and discovered to create sexual chemistry, due to this fact creating a powerful bond. However, that might have meant Ross and Rachel didn’t find yourself collectively, which most followers would have hated.

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